Checking in...1

Just me checking in. I have to throw a shout out to my friend Chaami. Whoever you are out there, I love you bro. You are my number one fan. I'm so stoked that you not only read my ninja books, but also left me such great reviews. It's a somebody like you that keeps me inspired and writing. I love you man!

Anyways, like I said before I've taken writing off for the summer, and maybe for longer. My books are selling, but I don't get many reviews. Maybe that means this wasn't meant for me. Maybe. If it is not, that's ok. I'm ok with it. I had a dream and I took a chance. So be it.  At least I gave it a shot. I tried. Like so many on American Idol or America's Got Talent - I ain't got none.

No problem. I can live with it. I will still go on with my life. I will go on with the things that I can do and be good at, like gardening. Hahaha, just kidding, I suck at that too. Let me re-evaluate at the end of summer and get back to you.  For now, stand by. I'm still here. -Adrian

Summer off from Writing

So here we are.  I'm three books in now.  LA Ninja I and II are written and published.  No more edits to come.  Pumps is done.  That one was way out in left field for me, mostly because I'm a straight guy who writes gangster/ninja stories.  So the fact that I turned out a chicklit book that has received accolades from industry professionals is exhilarating.  I still can't believe that one. lol... By the way, the fact that a story like Pumps would be labeled as chicklit does not bother me in one bit.  I think it's cool, because I know the main audience for that story would be the cool girls and fashionistas aka hot girls. And hey, that is alright by me lol.  After all, I married a hot fashionista.

Anyways, something funny you might realize if you read LA Ninja I was that I changed some of the names of the gangs are characters.  Apparently there was too much coincidence to real life gangs, as if that was something easy to actually keep up with.  Upon my research, I've found that there are way too many gangs to possibly keep up with, but I did my best.

I just want to say one last thing about what LA Ninja has become.  For one, I am inspired.  Those stories have turned out amazing.  I never intended them to go that way.  I never intended for things to go so shittily for Gabe all the time.  It just happened. I'm not yet sure how I'm going to get him out of the mess he's in, but I surely can't end it bad.  No matter what happens, and yes, I'm totally biased, but these stories should be movies.  I would love to see LA Ninja as a movie.  Right?

Speaking of ninja moves...I was recently checking out some old ninja movies that I used to watch as a kid in the 80s.  They suck! lol... No offense to Golan Globus or Sho Kosugi, who seemed to be in most of them, but they were not good.  Bad plots, bad acting, outlandish themes or sequences, like in Ninja III Domination when the bad ninja gets blown to smithereens in the beginning, or the sword flies on its own.  It goes on and on like that, but I wonder why nobody made a better movie? Well it's my dream that LA Ninja becomes one of the better ninja movies.  And with the resurgence of the 80s, would a resurrection of ninja movies be called for?

Well that's that for ninjas, for now.  I am going to be writing for awhile.  I'm taking the summer off from that.  Hopefully you guys agree with me about the LA Ninja, and hopefully you guys think it rocks.  Let me know either way.  -Adrian

LA Ninja II

Probably shouldn't be writing this now.  Had three glasses of wine to celebrate!  But... I'm here, and happy, and proud.  LA Ninja II is finally out, and when I did a search for it, you know where I found it? On scribd.com.  Yes!  I thought that was awesome, and for those who check out scribd or smashwords, you'll find that LA Ninja II is FREE! Yes!! FREE!

Of course, I'd like to make a profit, if possible, but like I said before, I'd rather people read it and love it than just make money off it.  My real dream is to make a movie of it.  You know that.  This is the movie I want to see for myself.  Anyways, that's that.  It's already doing well, except people still don't wanna leave reviews, which sucks for me because that doesn't encourage anyone else to read it.  But....I guess that's how it is.

Anyways, that's the deal right now.  I hope you all enjoy it.  Vida's story is a new one, and I think she is so strong that she spawns a story of her own.  It's gonna happen.  I have to go to high school format for that, but I'm pretty sure I can do that. I have to research is all.  I do a lot of that already! lol

Vida is gonna be crazy.  She is a ninja, trained by Gabe, and she is only 14. Now he left and she is going to high school? Wowsers. That's gonna be awesome. I don't even know where to start!  Wait, yes I do! lol...

That's the story for now.  Please let me know what you think.  Feedback is awesome, yet I rarely get any. Do I have any fans?  Do you love LA Ninja? Do you wanna see it in a movie? Does it suck? Anything, please let me know. I'm dying to hear from you.  YES YOU!!!! :)

L.A. Ninja I and II

You guys aren't gonna believe this, but I've been busting ass this past two weeks and I not only got LA Ninja II done, but I also got my final final final edits of LA Ninja I done too.  Both are published now!! Can you believe it??  I can't, but I'm glad to be done with that project for now. I can't wait to have a cold brew and bask in the glory that is the feeling of finishing a novel.  It will have to wait til' this weekend.

But wait!  The news gets better.  LA Ninja II is free.  That's right. F-R-E-E!!  Why?  Cause I'm awesome. Yes.  Cause I'm generous?  For sure.  Cause I'm egotistical?  If that means awesome and generous, then yes!!  Really, though, I am doing it because I think people that read LA Ninja deserve a freebie, and I also want to increase readership.  Yes, it's a marketing tactic!  Is it a cheap hook? Heck no.  I worked my ass off on that novel and I think it's pretty damn good.  So I hope you all enjoy it.

Disclaimer.  There is a problem over at amazon.  They're great, I love the company, and I sure buy a lot of crap there, but alas, they won't let me publish a free book.  I think, though, that I can do promotions where it is free for a time period, so I will definitely hook that up.  Other than that, you'd have to go to smashwords directly, or if you have a nook, or apple device, or any of several other devices besides the kindle you can get it free. So it shouldn't really be a problem, but if it is, drop me a message and I can help you out.

Anyways, that's it for now. I will come back this weekend and setup links, pictures, and more information on how to find LA Ninja II.  Oh, there's one other thing.  For anyone that did read LA Ninja I, I had to go back and change the names of the gangs and the cartels.  It seems that some of the names were "too close" to those of some actual real life gangs in the world. Hey, I didn't know there were so many gangs out there. Anyways, I found that out on my own, but that is a change that some people might notice. That's it.  Happy hunting! -A

Anchorman II Oscar snub, L.A. Ninja Rewrite: Update

Ok, so I noticed that these stupid puff pieces are turning into random update posts on bullshit that only I care about.  Oh well, so be it –I’m still not changing the name of this blog, so you guys can stop asking. 

I noticed that the brilliant minds over at “The Academy” have chosen to snub Anchorman II for any nominations in any category.  I won’t say much about it because I’m really not surprised, given their history.  Noted exceptions: Under Siege and Con Air –both of these awesome movies should have won Oscars.  It’s too bad about that.  The Oscar should have gone to you boys over on the Anchorman set.

Anyways, aside from that, while we were recently out and about in this huge small town I call San Diego, we found ourselves at this place called Seaport Village.  As far as tourist attractions go, I guess it is one, but we don’t care.  We just go there because sometimes there is nothing better to do.  Why else does anyone go anywhere?

So while we were there, this guy set up in the courtyard and no shit started playing the flute.  He even went as far as sending the sounds through an amplifier and speakers so that people a hundred yards could hear the joyous groove.  Now, I hate to be offensive to people I don’t know, but this guy was a total loser.  We were laughing, cause, well, you know, we are the cool kids, and we’ve always been the cool kids.  Laughing at losers is just what we do.  Anyways, to paint an accurate picture, this wasn’t just one of the regular hobos off the street setting up next to a hat for handouts.  This guy had equipment for his soundtracks that he played along with, and he had a poster of himself, wearing some hippie white gown while he sat on a chair.  Haha, I’m laughing right now thinking of it.

I of course thought of Ron Burgundy.  There was no doubt that he inspired Ron Burgundy’s flute scene in Anchorman I.  It had to be because this guy epitomized the vibe that Ronny gave off in his infamous table stomping scene.  I can just picture the guys from the Anchorman crew hanging out at SeaPort Village and coming across this guy and deciding to write that in somehow.  Tell me I’m wrong.

We all had a good laugh.  Enough of that drivel though.  I’m about two or three chapters away from finishing LA Ninja II.  It will be quite the accomplishment for me, and I gotta say, I’m very happy with it.  My style of writing just continues to change and evolve, and because of that, I’ve never been more sure that it will require me to edit LA Ninja I.  So now that’s on my plate.  Ugh, so much work to do! 

Aside from that, the good people at the Latina Book Club have put PUMPS on the list of best books of 2013!  I honestly have been blown away by this measure of recognition for anything that I’ve created.  I wish I could buy that entire organization lunch, and not some cheap Arby’s lunch either, I’m talking lobster salad, filet mignon, caviar, or whatever else the fancies eat at the Chez Snooty’s of the world.  Fine dining!  But alas, I am but a humble servant of humanity with a meager budget.  If I ever get to Manhattan, it will be Arby’s on me for the good people at the Latina Book Club. 

I hope that others will find the same kind of appreciation and enthusiasm for PUMPS that the LBC found.  So far there are a few reviews in on Amazon, and they are both good.  I’m extremely thrilled by that news, and I would be lying if I didn’t admit that news like that keeps me motivated to keep writing.  I’ll end this

Nervous About Ninjas...

Firstly, I want to mention that I was able to recover most of LA Ninja II: Rise of the Cartel.  I did lose a lot of work, but I’m going back through it now.  Those are the breaks, I guess.  I don’t know how else to look at it.  It totally fucking sucks that it happened, but since I do not possess a magic portal that could take me into the past to change things, then there’s nothing I can do.  If I did have one, I wouldn’t go back to that point anyways.  I’d go way back and change a whole lot of shit.  It’s stupid to think about, and it’s a waste of time, but I always think about things I’d change if I had a time machine.  But enough of that crap. 

Secondly, I saw a trailer for the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie.  I remember being a youngin’ when the first movie came out, way back when, and I thought it was cool at the time.  As lame as the kids today might think it is, at that time, the filmmaking of TMNT was cutting edge. 

As a ninja fan and a writer of two ninja books, it is both exciting and nervous for me to know that this movie is coming out.  I hope that it generates interest in the ninja genre, which may also bring new readers to my stories.  I am hopeful and excited for that.  But I’m nervous too.  What if TMNT generates a new spawn of movies of this genre?  What if my story gets remade or told in some version close to mine without it actually being mine?  In other words, what if I’m left out to dry?

I guess that is the risk and also the way things go.  The truth is that my LA Ninja stories will probably never reach a large scale audience, which in my opinion would suck.  I love LA Ninja.  The story is so gripping to me, and it is one that I’d love to see made into a screenplay and movie.  It is a movie I’d love to see.  Fucking eh it is!  And as far as that goes, the novel itself continues to be read by many, and even though only a few reviews exist, they are all positive ones.  That counts for a lot, and even if we don’t make it to the big time with our tale, at least a few others out there have shared in the story with me.  Thanks to all of you!  -Adrian

PS.  Oh, by the way, if anyone is interested in taking a stab at writing LA Ninja into a screenplay with me, please let me know.  I’ve never written one, and although I think I can cut one out, I am so entrenched in the other projects I have going on.  Since I don’t have endless time, that means I have to prioritize, which means new novels receive precedence.  Anyhow, let me know if you’re out there and wanna a piece of it.

Total Disaster

Today was the worst day ever.  The worst thing that could happen to an e-writer like me, happened.  I lost my book.  Get this, you won’t believe it.  I was on the last few paragraphs of my book.  Literally.  I had proofed it, edited it three times and got the cover done.  It was LA Ninja II.  My best work so far.  And poof!  It’s gone –not totally, but pretty big time.

Sigh…I’ve had a couple of cocktails tonight, in what should have been celebratory, but is now for condolence.  It sucks so bad.  I lost at least a month of work.  Luckily, I have a backup on CD from February, so I’m not totally Fubar, but it’s still bad.  I have to go back and rewrite what happens.  Maybe I have a chance to better the story and improve it, you might think, but I don’t see it that way.  It was perfect to me.  I had it right.  The story was money.

I truly don’t know how to explain things like this.  From a purely technical standpoint, what happened was mere probability.  I’ve lost things before.  Honestly though, as computers and programs progress, the probability of this type of disaster dwindles.  I trusted too much.  I knew better, too, which was why I had a backup to begin with, but I got sloppy towards the end.  I had my eye on the finish line and I got careless.  Fuck.  That’s all I can say.  Fuck.

Sigh…again.  Anyhow, that’s mostly why I haven’t posted much lately.  I’ve been rocking that shit out.  It was awesome, and now I have to go back.  I guess it’s like running a marathon and just before the finish line, you realize that you have to go back 6 miles and change your shoes and finish the race.  Or maybe, you go through a pregnancy, and go through the birth and just before you get to see the crazy love child’s face for the first time, God puts you back at month 7.  I don’t know.  That’s the best I can come up with at this moment. 

I will make sense of this disaster and report it out soon.  See y’all later, and I hope you’re having better luck than me. Peace out.  -A

Hot Girls Farting

The Fart Girl Poem

hot girl, hot girl, a work of art;

hot girl, hot girl, why must you fart?

a beautiful flower you are, so much;

but what is this, this, dust you thrust? 

so pretty, so sweet, so raunchy, so cheap;

so gentle and soft, you just belt it and scoff; 

a rumble of the buns, then a laugh then a run;

drop bass, make haste; I think I can taste;

one kiss, quick, then float the biscuit;

the spark in your eyes, then fart and disguise;

blame him, blame her, blame them;

oh hot girl, you farter, you farter.

I think it’s funny that the first poem that I’ve ever written turns out to be about hot girls farting.  That is so me.  And it goes to show why I’m not a poet.  I can’t write music lyrics, which is basically what I think poetry is.  It took me days and several tries just to write this stupid one about hot girls farting, and it still amounted to very little -just mostly hot air (ba-da-dum!).

I am writing the piece just as an observation and commentary on modern life and modern people.  And of the great many things that I’ve observed, one is that chicks are now open farters.  Hey, don’t get me wrong, this guy thinks it’s great.  I like pretty much any situation where women are doing things that traditional men have done or said that women shouldn’t or couldn’t do.  That may be as big as hold a CEO position, be President, or be as small as talking, laughing with their mouths open or, in this case, farting.  More power to you, girls.  Fart on!

Ok, so a certain someone that is very close to me and also under the age of two, let’s call her “Jane”, likes to fart.  I know she likes it because she laughs about it all the time.  I do too.  She farts, I laugh.  I fart, I laugh.  Childish?  Absolutely.  I am quite so, on many things.  I’ve fallen into laugh attacks when people have dropped huge farts while using the urinal at the bathroom at my job.  I think it’s funny, what can I do.  So Jane farts a lot.  And it’s because she is healthy.  She eats a very balanced and nutritious diet loaded with fruits, vegetables, legumes, all balanced with some healthy fats, animal protein, and breads and cereals.  She gets the occasional sugar too, through cinnamon cookies and yogurt.  We are not monsters, after all. 

So when Jane, who eats better than we do, farts, we think it’s supposed to be like that.  After all, she has the ideal diet.  I asked myself if I was going to try to teach her that farting was wrong to do in front of people and that she should make an effort to hold it in or go to the bathroom to do it.  That seemed wrong, though.  I mean really, who does that?  I bet a lot of people.

I asked my wife about it, and she quickly pointed out that it was not only more accepted to fart openly, but that her friends from work fart all the time.  That’s when things began to formulate in my mind.  Fortunately, Jane is lucky to be blessed with looks.  She is going to be a beautiful woman someday, and even though it hurts me to describe it so, she is going to be a hot girl.  More than that, she is going to be a hot girl farting, and she is going to own it.